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Lawyer pick up lines 👩‍⚖️⚖️ in 2024

Are you my lawyer?
Because you should be screwing me.

Let’s adjourn to the bedroom.

I’m not in Big Law, but I got a big… Ego and Major Depression, please tell me I’m pretty.

When they introduce you to their friend* “I’d like to make a rule 14a motion to join a third party?”

Can I get your number?
One call, that’s all.

Hey boy, I don’t need your call number. I know I can find you in the Fine section.

You want to approach the bench and badger my witness?

I have the ability to turn the lawyer thing off and act like a normal human when I leave the office.

Just be who you are; I’m not the one to judge.

I’d have to plead insanity if I ever left you.

Are you looking to tender some performance?
Cause I’m ready, willing, and sufficient to satisfy.

I ask less questions than Clarence Thomas.

Are you pro-bono or just happy to see me.

Let’s just say boy, if you give me your instructions well, I can be a very vocal advocate.

Are you confidential files?
Because I’d like to examine you in camera.

Are you the commerce clause? Cuz there are no limits to what I would do with you

Hey, if I’m willing to create some legal relations with you, will you let me into your contract?

Hey boy, I hear you’re of good fame and character. Just disclothes, and I’ll admit you.

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