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Lawyer pick up lines 👩‍⚖️⚖️ in 2025

Are you the Court of Appeals because I’m tryna get overturned.

Baby you’re thiccer than my ConLaw casebook

Are your confidential files?
Because I’d like to examine you on camera.

Hey boy, did you see the season finale of Suits?
Well I know a nice file room where we can reenact it.

Why don’t you take a look at my briefs?

Baby, if you were a contract, you’d be the fine print.

I will sue you for the lost opportunity to find myself instead of thinking about you every day.

I think I’d be liable for negligence if I neglected to come over and talk to you.

Don’t take this the wrong way, counselor, but I think you should drop your suit.

Are you a restrictive covenant?
Because I’d like to touch and concern you.

Are you my lawyer?
Because you should be screwing me.

Let’s adjourn to the bedroom.

I’m not in Big Law, but I got a big… Ego and Major Depression, please tell me I’m pretty.

When they introduce you to their friend* “I’d like to make a rule 14a motion to join a third party?”

Can I get your number?
One call, that’s all.

Hey boy, I don’t need your call number. I know I can find you in the Fine section.

You want to approach the bench and badger my witness?

I have the ability to turn the lawyer thing off and act like a normal human when I leave the office.

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